The stakes in crucial conversations are high and usually makes emotions run high. The individuals struggle to stay cool. Most of the persons calm up for fear of speaking up thus worsening the situation. The skills learnt in in the Crucial Conversation book equip the learner with effective dialogue techniques. Stress may make a person moves towards being violent or silent style. In silence, the individual may tend to withdraw, mask, or avoid the crucial conversation. Whereas in violence, the person may tend to attack, label, or control the crucial conversation. The style under stress score seeks to analyze the answer of six statements in both silence and violence. The score is between zero and six. In this test, it is better when the score is lower than when it is higher. It is so because the higher the score the more the likelihood that the individual will move from silence to violence.

I undertook the tests after establishing or identifying the relationship between my boss, friends, coworkers, and family members. I also identified the circumstances that would anger or keep me silent in a conversation. In summary, my result is a reflection of my seven crucial conversation skills. There are three response of each of the seven skills and the score can range from 0 to 3 in each category. It is better when the score is higher. I scored one in the state my path, two in exploring others’ paths, zero in move to action, one in starting with heart, zero in learning to look, zero in making it safe and, one in mastering my stories. I had the highest score in exploring other’s path while I failed in moving to action, learning to look, and making it safe to dialogue. I had a score in mastering my story, stating my path, and starting the conversation with the heart.

I am surprised by some of the results. I thought I was good in creating a safe environment for a crucial conversation but according to the score that is the area that I got a zero score. The score have made me realize that I need to improve on areas that I have a lower score to improve on my conversation skills. Those areas include: moving to action, learning to look, and making it safe to continue the crucial conversation. I am not surprised by the results on my effort in making any crucial conversation thrive. The key reason why I enter into a conversation is to share ideas, understand other people logic, brainstorm, and if possible get into a conclusion. Exploring other people’s path is one of the ingredients for dialogue.

One aspect that I like about my style is the ability to explore other paths. I would like to improve on areas I had a zero score. The areas are learning to look, make it safe, and moving to action. I also want to be able to perfectly master my story, state my path and start with the heart during a crucial conversation. I am confident that with the following improvement, I would be able to better my arguments, and dialogue while having a crucial conversation. In the bid to improve my skills, I have purpose to attend training on crucial conversations. Thus, I will find a public training course in my area that teaches skills for nurturing open dialogue, around topics that are of high-stake, risky, and emotional.  I have also subscribed to a free newsletter in vital smarts website that will act as a valuable learning resource. The newsletter will assist us in handling factual and realistic conversations.


Important Leadership Skills